Saturday, June 04, 2005

Kryptonite

I grew up in a land far away
Where it was hot and always day.
We had two suns – one here, one there
That illuminated our planet everywhere.
But our Krypton was dying fast
And we had long since seen the last
Of our peaceful lives;
Our husbands, children, friends and wives
As everyday we could feel
The ground no more on even keel.
Earthquakes in plenty were felt
Lives were lost, and many lost their wealth
As buildings, cars, and planes were taken
By the surface which was a-breakin'
And so one fine man with money plenty
Went down to his basement, which was empty
Except for one large box,
Large enough to hold a fox
And took from it a cylinder slender
And over a year he took to mend her.


For he was a powerful man
A scientist of the Yakooboo clan
And was aspiring to be a family man.
The year before, he was inspired
(By the first tremors ever fired)
to go home and see his wife
to give up work for family life.
But he knew his world would pass
Before he had breathed his last,
Gone west, KAPLOW!
And he thought, "Wow!
What if I'm still there
When this planet gives us the scare
Of our lives by blowing up?
Will my kids be safe from the rut?"
And so it was that he made
A cylinder shaped ship made out of jade
And rubies and diamonds and such
But it really couldn't fit in much
Except a child or two
But he thought that space for one should do.

And so it was that one fine day
That he became a dad in the Year of the Lay
And just a month had passed
Before the tragedy came at last.
At semi-dusk, after a fine sunny day
The ground finally fell away
"This is the end!!' he thought.
So quickly he went down and got
The spaceship, all glittering green
And put in his son, serene,
Because the child knew not
Into what he had just got
And to save him from fate's horrible berth,
His dad sent him to planet Earth.

The ship went rocketing into the sky
Its tail bidding the doomed planet goodbye
For the instant they were out of sight,
The planet blew up with all its might.
But the little boy, he went on
Full of life, though his world was gone.
And a month or so down the line
While everything was going fine
In a small town in southern Cal.
A wife (whose husbands name was Hal)
Chanced to see a shooting star
Fall from the sky next to her car.
"Hal!!" she screamed, terrified,
"Oh my god! I nearly died!
For had I been at that spot
A second ago I should have been shot
By that bullet of tremendous size –
Hey! Wait, do I see eyes
Hidden in that smooth, hard shell?
Let's go see if the thing is well."
And so they walked fast
To the green object the sky had cast
Upon their yard that very night
Thrown at Earth with Krypton's might.

"Open it! Open it quick!"
her voice was calm, her tone was slick.
With anticipation in their eyes
They pressed buttons of the largest size
Till they heard a loud 'POP'
And when they looked at its top
What should they see?
A gurgling, squirming baby!
"He's so tall! Look at his eyes!"
"Oh my god! Jesus Christ!"
"Thank you for this blessing, O One above!
We shall give him all our love!"
"But look, he came from the stars!"
"No matter! Now he is ours!"
"Oh Hal! What shall we name the lad?
Henry, Michael, Steven, maybe Jad?"
To which Hal replied with ease
"Clarke Kent his name will be."
And so it was that the couple fair
Got a child, from God knows where.

Clarke's life in school was fun;
He got to play and run
All across the grounds everyday,
Clarke Kent was here to stay!
He always did well in class
And answered only when asked.
On the track he was a sight
He overcame obstacles with his superior might
He could jump higher and run faster
He could even hold up the P.T. master!
His strength was his, a trait
Of Clarke Kent's physical state.
So for many years life went swell
Everything was good, his family well.
Then one day he felt a change
In his already potent range
Of ammo, guns and the like
Of great hearing and amazing sight.
He heard everything in the hall
And he could see through the wall
He could jump high as a pole
If anything moved
Be it a leg or a hoof
Well, he could sense it all.
All this he confided in his best friend Kate
[Who, incidentally, was his date]
That night at dinner, when
He heard a crash and then
Some people screaming so he ran
To the upturned, blazing van
And ripped open the door and went in
To the fierce, scorching din
And burst out with husband and wife,
Both in his arms, both very much alive.
Yet he, amazingly enough,
Wasn't even hurt by the boiling stuff.

By this time Kate arrived on the spot
"Goodness gracious me!" she thought
"My dear Clarke! You're still alive!
And you saved both husband and his wife!
But what is this? You are unburnt
By that flaming van upturned!
And how did you get here so fast
And jump over that five-storey cliff and last
Out without breaking a shoulder
Even though you landed on this hard boulder?"
Clarke thought for a while
And then he said with a smile
"It must have been the Calcium C
that my mother gave me
that enabled me to take a leap
from so high up upon this heap.
But I don't feel normal, I don't feel fine.
I'm going to ask dad if he's truly mine
Because these traits do not show
In mom, dad or my bro.
I know there's something here not right
I don't need fantastic sight
I'm sure not everything does indeed fit
But Kate! Come, lets eat a bit
For I am famished, and hungry too!
And I was thinking, are not you?"
At the end of dinner he asked her out
And she said "Yes! Without a doubt!
Where shall we go next time we meet?
Must we go somewhere to eat?
I wish to see the stars and moon
And orchids and roses in full bloom."
To this he said "I know a place
Where we can gaze and gaze at outer space.
A little field behind my home
Where we can both be alone
And I was wondering if - "
"Shhh! There's my older brother Biff!
He really hates you
And all the things that you do.
Why don't you drop me now
And I'll get home somehow."


And so it was that after dinner,
Clarke felt like a real winner.
He had a girl, he had a life
And he saved that husband and wife.
And now in the nights later hours,
He wanted to know how he got those powers
So he asked his dad
"Why can I se through the wall?
Why can I hear everything in the hall?
That I can jump high as a pole
That I achieve all my goals?"
To which his father softly said
[Because he was sick in bed]
"Ah Clarke, you're old enough now
To know when and why and where and how
You came from the stars unseen
In a spaceship glittering green.
You know that box in the garage
Saying '1974 in March'?
That box holds your ship
And a clip we found at your hip.
We took you in from the stars
As though you were one of ours."
And then he proceeded to extract
A chip colored silver and black.
Clarke took the chip in his hand
[It was stretchy like a rubber-band]
And planet Krypton materialized
Right there in front of his eyes.
And then he saw a man just like him
Say "Hello son, I'm last of kin.
In fact, I'm you're dad,
And I know you think you're going mad
But listen give me some time
And then everything will be fine.
You were my only child and I
Wanted to save you even if I died.
So I sent you to Planet Earth
Whose sun's enormous girth
Would give you powers that no man
Could ever have had, or ever can.
Use these powers well my boy
For they are no ordinary toy
These powers you must not waste
Use them to good taste
I know you will, because you are wise
I could see it in your month-old eyes
Good-bye my son! Miss you, we shall - "
At which point father Hal
Said "Oh me! Oh my!
You Kryptonites can fly!"
Clarke did not believe his dad –
Which was rather sad –
Because daddy did point out a fact…
But now it was time for Clarke to act.
He set off at a sprint towards the mill
Just beyond the very next hill
And when he reached the fall
He jumped, and didn't come back down at all.
"Oh my god! I'm flying! Its true!
Dearest father! Thank you! Thank you!
I shall use my powers well
To save the good, and send the rest to Hell!"
And with that, Clarke flew away
And has not returned till this day
Leaving his belongings unfurled
Along with a ship from another world.

Clarke Kent by day, Superman by night
Does his very best to fight
All who do not heed law today
In a country called the U.S.A.
His superior hearing, his ability to fly
His power to fry you with his naked eye
Shoplifters and terrorists alike
Are no match for his super-human might
The cities guardian angel is he
Buzzing around, busy as a bee.
There is no crime he cannot stop
He is the ultimate super-cop.
Upon crime he has a hex
He wears 'Chaddies' over his spandex!
He can stop a plane and sink a ship
He can carry the world on his hip

Should there be a crime
My name they call
I'm 'Superman' to one and all.


- Aveek Katiyar

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