Thursday, December 30, 2004

Black and White

Aveek (in Coonoor)

So Much For Christmas

YAY...! Christmas is here! And gone now. I had so much fun.
Maybe I was wrong about Christmas. Maybe it IS (NOT) the Day when you and your family laugh, unwrap gifts, call friends and family over, and have a jovial time.
Christmas is when you bribe your kids to be good next year with lots of presents, hot chocolate, and tons of cash. It's NOT when you lecture your kids on allowance, on Tsunamis and how you should think of the money we splurge on petty gifts that we could instead use to help the needy. It is NOT the time you make your kids grovel and plead on all fours to get you that amazing Hilfiger shirt that they've been raving and ranting 'bout for the past 2 months (Oh bite me if you think I'm still going on with the Hilfiger post). Is NOT the time you give your kid dirty looks and expect them to do the laundry at 8 IN THE MORNING!!! Its not the time you expect your children (fine, child) to suddenly become mature and expect him to work like a grown up person, but still refuse him any allowance, saying it helps biuld charecter (Calvin,I'm sure you agree!!). And it's NOT the time when you call your children (again - child) deaf because you've got an ulcer ad can't speak over half a decibel, and as punishment you don't get any presents.

So much for christmas. Santa can go suck an egg. And his elves can microwave themselves. Festive spirt - shmestive spirit. It can all go burn itself up in the upper layer of the atmosphere for all I care.

I love Christmas. And New Year. And any other festival that you can think of that will enable me to 'bond' with my parents. Like World Nazi Day, or something.

Wednesday, December 22, 2004

Tommy Hilfiger - Racist. SO WHAT?!

Tommy Hilfiger. WOW. What amazing clothing. Lovely designs, fine craftsmanship and one HUGE price tag. But it’s worth it. The clothes fit perfectly, feel snug and cozy, and are hardy. Given the chance, (and the money) I’d definitely want to fill my wardrobe with this brand.
But the guy is racist. He believed that blacks shouldn’t wear his clothes. He believed that only the pure were fit to wear his range of haute couture. Should the guy (and hence, the brand) be boycotted? Should we stop buying his clothes? Should we hold a strike to show our feelings and inclinations away from (or towards) his mindset?
I have nothing against blacks. I am not some prejudiced freak. I know everyone has the same rights and should be treated similarly. I know that people shouldn’t discriminate. I know that everyone has varied opinions, and that they should have the sense to reserve some of them for themselves.
So should I stop buying his clothing in order to passively refuse to promote his brand? Does that make any sense? He does, after all, make very good clothes, clothes that I like, that I would be proud to own, clothes that I adore. Why should I stop buying? Why should I have anything against him? It’s his opinion, isn’t it? Why should I stop him from thinking what he does? It’s not like I promote some conspiracy to give blacks some sort of bar to buying his clothes, right? He isn’t doing anything actively to diss them, is he? I don’t think that by buying his brand and boosting his ego (as one of my friends has testily suggested) we are in any way promoting his hatred (?) of the blacks. Are we?
What say you?

Tuesday, December 21, 2004

LIVE!!LIVE!!LIVE!! And Coming To A City Near You!

The artists attack! And this time they're out to prove me wrong! They will have the most marvelous live performances on the planet! They will rock the audience to the ground! They will etch the memory into our skulls! And they will make it worth waiting in mile-long cues outside Palace Grounds 5 hours before the show, screaming at everyone to move on!
That's right! The much criticized Sting, and awe-inspiring Dire Straits, and the ever-loved U2 are coming to a city near you! Now your dream of looking on in awe at these Gods performing just 20 meters in front of you can finally become a reality! Just make sure you keep yourself free on the 5th of February and the 4th of March. Especially You, Sneha.
Sting is coming here on the 5th of February!! AAAAHHHH!!! He better prove me wrong, and stun me (not to mention a significantly large population of Bangalore) with His most scintillating performance yet! All my life I hoped I'd go abroad and be at one of his performances, and it looks like my fantasies are finally taking shape!
Next on the list are Dire Straits. If you haven't heard them, go to he nearest music store, pick up their Live Album, “Alchemy" and go right to track 6 - Sultans Of Swing. 10 minutes of pure, mesmerizing Rock, and electric guitaring mastery. Mark Knopfler is not just A God, he's The God. No one can play a guitar like him, except maybe 2 or 3 other artists to ever have lived. Excellent vocal, amazing base, top-notch drumming, and, as previously described, guitaring at it's absolute best.
Last, but not least, U2. WOW. The band that has been rocking the world - most recently with their single,” Vertigo". And not so long ago with the hard hitting,” Elevation". And now they're coming here!! To India, Bangalore to show us what they're all about! I'm just at a loss for words. This is too much for me, but bring it on!!

If these bands do perform well, I will take back all my critisism and judgments. But if they don't... }:-D

Sunday, December 12, 2004

My Breakfast

Normally, I (not to mention most sane people in this galaxy) wouldn’t get up until the late afternoon. But today is different. Today I got up by 8:30 and was ready (shower an all) by 9:00. Why? Because Mum is making breakfast. Trust me, it's worth getting up for. And if I (the grand master of supreme laziness) say so, you have just got to believe it. It's not your standard morning bread-toast and butter breakfast. Or rather, not just your bread-toast and butter breakfast. It's a Five Star Hotel Multi-Course breakfast, no holes barred.
It starts off well enough, with a tall glass of fruit juice of your choice. That's about 200mL of the best juice in the world - Ceres. Then comes the first set of choices you make - do you want a HUGE (3 egg) omelet, or a HUGE (3 egg) fried egg? This decision made, within five minutes you have a huge sphere of 3-eyed egg (at least, that's what I'd choose) on your plate. This, of course, comes with standard accompaniments, in the form of unlimited mashed potato sprinkled with pepper and Tabasco sauce, and a hefty chunk of homemade brown bread. If, however, you wish to chew your potatoes and work your jaws further, you have the option of asking for Jacket Potatoes hot and fresh from the oven, sliced down the centre, and filled with butter. As you watch the butter melt along the insides of the Potato, you add the grated cheese, sprinkle with pepper and chopped sprig of spring onion, or dribble some Hot-sauce on it and take one nice, full bite of this divine creation of (wo) man.
As you recover from the dose of ecstasy, you are faced with yet another choice - Ham Slices, Bacon Strips, or Succulent Keels Sausages? Again, Keels is by far the best producer of sausages in the world. Highly recommended. You choose two (the Bacon and Sausages for me) and watch while the cook (mum) makes the sausage do all kinds of flips mid-air in front of you, and manipulates the bacon like a veteran snake charmer performing a rehearsed act.
Another shot of ecstasy. Addictive, isn't it?
Make way for another glass of that heavenly juice that God reserved for the Just - Ceres, to quench your growing thirst. You are about to go for seconds, full as you are, when you see mum taking out Desert from the oven - hot Apple Pie, which she will serve with a dollop of vanilla ice-cream. Your mind reels, now clearly at a loss as to what to do with that last square centimeter of space in your stomach (and indeed your entire body). Should you go for the potent, satisfying line-up again, or wait a few seconds till mum cuts the Pie and places the Original Sin in front of your longing eyes (and mouth)? You choose to complete this entire round, and opt for the Pie.
The Pie, served in a crystal glass bowl, comes with the ice cream already melting at its side, just begging to be devoured. And so you oblige! Without waiting for mum to finish explaining how many hours it took her to perfect everything, you, in one fell swoop, you make a great void where the Apple Pie so recently was. You feel its warmth as it (not so) softly settles itself in your stomach, and feel the world going hazy again. (And here the ecstasy kicks in again...)

You wake up in your room, snug under the covers of your bed. You look at the time, and it's the early evening. But you don't care. You can't move, and you don't want to. Or have to. Mum and Dad leave you to yourself, respecting the unsaid Law of Rest after Heaven. Slowly, slowly you drift back into the blurry world of the semi-conscious, and then into an all-together blissful sleep.

And that, dear readers, is what makes my life worth living. Bon Appetit!

Thursday, December 09, 2004


For all you people who are into music - and I mean real music, not Maiden, Blcksabbath, or Megadeath - here's an interesting question to to waste time thinking about. Why the heck can't you're favorite artiste perform well on stage?? Oh come on, you know that all his live performances SUCKED!
Have you ever noticed the (complete abscence of) quality your singer has when it comes to a live performance? Take, for example, Sting. He's one of my musical idols. Amazing music since god-alone-knows-when. I recently came across one of his more recent albums, called "All This Time" where he sang all his famous hits like 'Roxanne', 'Fields Of Gold', 'A Thousand Years', and so on live. And he sucked. He (quite literally) wasn't singing it. He was speaking it, with a little pitch adjustment here and there.
Now everyone may think it sounds damn cool to give their concerts a 'personal' touch, and make the audience feel (almost) interacted with, but in reality, all they do is spoil one heck of a good song for no real reason. And to top this off, people pretend to have loved it, just so they can be Cool, and be part of the In Crowd.
As far as I know, the only artist that is an exeption to this is Dire Straits. Their album "Alchemy", is live in london, and it is electric!!! If you've heard 'Sultans Of Swing' and liked it, you will go bananas after hearing the Live version - 10 minutes of a pure, electric, sensational Mark Knopfler ceation at its absolute best. WOW. Him and Joe Satiriani are the only guitarist - performers that do a really good job of it - intentionally.
Of course, there's other people who do it well in concert. But that's not because they want to do it that way - it's because they know no other way to do it, and so it sounds a lot like the recorded thing, which, frankly, I don't think the mob - oops! - crowd minds.
A classic example is (forgive me Aasimah) Bryan Adams. Sure, he's got some good music, looks, and voice, but damn, he's got absolutely no creativity. Not that its a bd thing, I thought that he performed really well on stage, coming and getting some girls to sing wit him and all. And that would only be possible if he stuck to his original tune, which he did.
And, to give due credit to Arjun's Gods, Maiden didn't perform that bad either, and I quite liked a live recording (that shouldn't make sense, right...? ;-) ) of Metallica that I heard.
If you look inside and question yourself, I'm confident that you will find you feel the same. Some one should sue these rich p*mps for emotional trauma or something. I mean, how can anyone put up with bad music?? Even the artist him/her/themselves?

Wednesday, December 08, 2004

Not ONE Blog

I've been through many interesting blogs recently(mostly my friends'), and I have found one consistency in all of them - they all have a specific point which they build up to in every post. It's really quite facinating, when you compare styles of writing and se, quite clearly, the difference between good, bad, and really spectacular writing. I have also realised that most of my posts have a theme, but I'm always heading off on a tangent to what-ever it was that I was trying to say in the first place. This post is no exeption.
Blogs of particular interest:
Meghna's Blog(On my links bar)
Arun Katiyar's Blog(Also on my links bar)

You have just got to see the way they string otherwise random phrases into a strong foundation, and then build right up with a solid structure, and finish it off in a most satisfying manner, leaving little or nothing left to desire. I have got to learn to that someday. Until then... Read On!!

Sunday, December 05, 2004

Our Nerd Fest

Hey, sorry, long time, no blog. Had one really strange week. Anyway, it's over, and I got unit tests tomorrow, which, of course, true to my behaviour, I haven't studied for.
On Friday was our first ever Nerd Fest at Deeksha. And it was a collosal failure!! I know I go there and all, but I can't help this - HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!
It was the ultimate congregation of all the proudest nerds in the city - and man, even they didn't like it that much. There was the Kumarans contigent, whih was by far th geekiest. And so proud of it too. "Look at me, I encompass all of the knowledge in any text book you show me. I can tell you the distnce from Earth to the Sun, and the DNA constituent of the African Bull Frog, but I can't use common sense to build a torch given a bulb, wires, taape, and a battery pack!" and all this said with great pomp. What total losers.
Then came NPS. No offense to anyone, one of them was my friend an all, but this was the real upsetter - Not even one of the (Two) NPS qualified as one of the final 5 teams! Hmmm... NPS needs to buck up on its mugging techniques.
Then there were a few other schools that came. OK, actually, there were quite a lot. None-the-less, the only thing that went off well was the treasure hunt. It took place after the prelim/elimination round got over, and there was chaos. Just imagine a 1-acre plot nearly completely built up, leaving very little room for recreation, and making you feel rather claustrophobic. Now imagine 120 kids running about it, looking for eight scraps of paper scarcely larger than the thumb on your right hand.
What chaos! And the best part was, I had so much fun encouraging it. Everyone was running about with wierd, rhymin, pentameter clues to figure out, and I just stood in the mmiddle and pretended to not want to give myself away. And then, the instant someone caught me, I'd just send them off on some other tangent which they'd probably come out of after the hunt got over.
The rest of the show, however, was,for lack of a more blurry word, BORING. We just drove forward relentlessly, not caring to take break or anything. The projection system was so ineffective, mainly because it was under a small, badly put up shamiana, and it was boiling. Not to mention the fact that everyone was getting bored to death, because:
a) Points were doled out in 1s and 2s.
b) Because the questions that we(OK, they, not me) had set up were so hard, even the Uber-nerds were finding it hard to get the answers right.

Finally, it ended with the 'Young Inventor' event. I thought of, planned, put together, and organised the entire thing myself(Notice the hint of pride in my, er, voice...?). Here, you were given more than what you need, and you were given a total of 45 minutes to construct a Torchlight, a 2-way switch, and find the focal length of the lenses. OK, so no one expected them to do it in that much time, but jeez, they couldn't even think of a simple solution to the torch!
This just goes to show that no matter how 'good' you are at 'studying', you'll get no where unless you cando something to prove your point. Stupid nerds. During the finale, everyone generally voted that the event was 'irritating' and 'useless'. What total morons. Go squeeze that information out of your head, son. In the near future, they're gonna ban our right to read and refer, so forget the creativity inside you, just MUG! MUG! MUG!
PFFFT. No wonder the world is the way it is...
Orbit my parallel universe! ;-)

Wednesday, December 01, 2004

Absolute B*llsh*t

Everyone's been saying that my behavior is becoming progressively more aggressive after Mona's death. I wonder if the two are related...?
On top of that, no one will sympathize with me. It's always," No, Aveek. {Fill any name here} has his reasons for being such a prick" or "No, Aveek. One day when you grow up you'll appreciate the torture we/he/she/they made you go through" Well, I don't care. They can all go fry in an oven(Hey, wait, that's not right - but then again, this is MY blog, and I have all right to say whatever the hell I want here) for all I care.
Everyone just wants to shower me with advice - advice on how to eat, behave, talk, study, live, and die. And before I know it, they'll be telling me about all their failures, and how I shouldn't make the same mistake. F**k them. IWANT TO MAKE THE MISTAKES, OK? I don't care if you missed the chance to run India Today, or never got to be the world's greatest psychological researcher. I DON'T CARE. Go mope over it in your own room, and don't waste my time with crap that won't help me(Realistically speaking).
Then, I'm banned from using 'Foul' language like 'Suck Up', 'Gaylord', 'Fag'(What the...?! Why??) and a few other things that most take for granted. Why, may I ask? Because my little angel of a sister(B*llsh*t) might get affected. Heck, my sister probably knows more foul language than me(OK, exaggeration, but still, she certainly knows a lot more than just the aforementioned stuff)!
Jeez, this world is not harsh, or vast, or strange. Just stupid.
Plain stupid.